big news..

...we are having a baby!!!

i cannot even begin to describe how excited and blessed we feel. there are just no words. 

i found out shortly after our trip to jamaica in december.. i had a feeling that i might be but didn't want to get my hopes up too much. i immediately cried when i saw the positive.. happy happy tears. 

i went to find rob and robert playing at the train table and told rob that we had an early christmas gift :-)

we spent a lot of the first trimester (and some days still) on edge. we have had a rough year with miscarriages. it is not easy, as too many women know, to be pregnant after a loss. it is hard to find the courage to try again.. let alone walk into each appointment, praying you see your baby on the screen.

i have to say though.. only with God's help.. i have been pretty calm. my last miscarriage (finally) made me realize we are not in control.. of any of this. no matter how many symptoms you have or don't have, how good your lab numbers look.. the only thing that wills our sweet babies into this world is God. period.

so, i have the most creative friends.. and i am stealing one of their ideas :-) helen is pregnant with her second baby and does a precious week by week update! i love it.. so i decided to do it too : here we go! weeks 5 through 8!

How far along?:  5 weeks

Weight gain: none

Cravings: none

Maternity clothes: nope

Symptoms:  tired, bloated, cramps, back pain

Gender prediction:  boy

This week: excited but nervous.. we have had miscarriages this last year so we are very cautious to get excited (that does not mean you are any less loved or wanted, my sweet baby). Good news is that my serial HCGs looked very reassuring. 

How's daddy doing?: good! also very nervous

How's Robert doing?: he’s clueless :-) he is just happy and seems to have more energy than ever!

How far along?:  6 weeks

Weight gain: none

Cravings: orange juice (so I got this idea from my friend, Helen.. who was also craving OJ and when I read that I thought OH that sounds GOOD! ha) and salt & vinegar chips

Maternity clothes: nope

Symptoms:  bloated, cramping, lower back pain, nauseated on and off.. definitely needing to snack more frequently

Gender prediction:   boy

This week: Went to see OB due to my history.. there you were. We were able to see a gestational sac, yolk sac, and fetal pole. There was no heart beat yet. I’ll admit.. I cried for at least an hour in my car in the parking lot. I just wanted to see that heart beating.. but my doctor assured me that I was barely 6 weeks and that we don’t always see cardiac activity at that point. The predicted due date is August 29th or 30th (your big brother’s was August 30th too!! CRAZY!)

How's daddy doing?: always the rational one, he is being very reassuring and trying to stay positive :-)

How's Robert doing?: the same.. we don’t plan on telling him until after the first trimester.. but I am sure he loving all the new snacks in mommy’s purse

How far along?:  7 weeks

Weight gain: 1 pound

Cravings: nada.. nothing sounds good!

Maternity clothes: nope

Symptoms:  hello morning sickness! lots of nausea and vomiting some days, very tired, major pregnancy brain

Gender prediction: girl.. nausea seems intense!

This week: we had an eventful week in the house.. I got sick with Type A Influenza (despite the shot) and had to go to the ER to get some fluids. Between the fevers and my “morning” sickness, I was just too dehydrated. After 2 Liters, I felt human again :-) I was started on Tamiflu as was the rest of the house. Unfortunately, little Robert spiked fevers before we were able to prevent it. So sad! Good news? In the ER, I saw your heart beat little one! It was the most beautiful thing in the world (only equaled by your brother’s heart beat). I have been crying happy tears since. 

How's daddy doing?: Relieved to know there is cardiac activity! So happy! Tired.. he has been super dad since I have been living on the couch, barely able to lift my head!

How's Robert doing?:  little guy is not feeling well, but he is such a trooper. I am sure he is starting to wonder why his mom is not as energetic as usual.. he is constantly asking me to GO!

How far along?:  8 weeks

Weight gain: 1 pound

Cravings: peaches, apple sauce

Maternity clothes: nope

Symptoms:  pretty sick this week! lots of nausea and throwing up at least 3 times a day.. towards the end of this week, the vomiting was much worse at night- from about 5pm on!  taking zofran, but don’t find that it completely helps. 

Gender prediction: boy.. don’t know why, just my thought this week

This week: got to see you again, my love. we went in for our 8 week check with my fav NP. you are growing perfectly. we got to hear your beautiful heartbeat. strong and fast! i set up all the first trimester appointments.. next one will be at 12 weeks, then the NT sono at 13 weeks.

How's daddy doing?: super dad to the rescue (again)!! rob has been helping me SO much since I have been so sick. i think we are both getting more and more hopeful about the pregnancy.

How's Robert doing?:  doing great! he is feeling all better and back to his busy little self! he is so sweet to me while I am throwing up.. he pushes my head in the toilet, pats my back and imitates the noise... while laughing. gross. thank God for little boys. in other news, he went pee pee on the big boy potty this week! woohoo! all that extra time in the bathroom is paying off!